Friends..

Soo another day turns the bend and I am sitting here at my computer STILL..
My life has completely changed from what I had envisioned and hoped for just from a few weeks ago...
I lost the person that I cared for..
Well not lost they made their own choices..
But had to loose..
I do not want to be lied to..
I do not want to make them feel like they have to lie to me..
If that is the case then things should be different..
Like they are now..
I was once a very important role in their life..
But now I am moving back to the shawdows and just going to listen to their stories..
Let them tell me about their life and how things have gone..
I have made my own mistakes in life..
Why try to stop other people from doing it?
I guess we all need that little learning experience sometime..
But she got her dream..
I gave her that..
I stuck things through to make sure that she would have what she thinks she wants out of life..
That is the least I could do..
I mean heck.. ya know..
So for a while things will be hard because I am going to be very lonely..
No one to have in wakeup to..
On the other hand..
Things might be changing at work drastically..
50-50 chance of me going to days..
Ohh yeah..
I will be loving that!.. Normal schedule!!
But things are up in the air right now..
Because our beloved dispatcher could be leaving..
She has been to some interviews..
Gone to some drug screens..
Seems like pretty promising..
Soo then ultimately her position will be opening up..
WOO hoo..
We shall see...

But life right now is not in the best of shape..