Humm days may suck...

Well This may actually stink for me..
I might not like days to much..
But anyways..
Life is still going.. Cannot complain, I mean I am alive and kicking and working. I saw her yesterday for a brief moment. I tried not to show my sadness for her. I tried not to show how much I am hurting. We talked for a little while and had a good conversation. I miss her... I might not just miss her but the things that went on.. Like the dog, the bickering, the arguments, stupid little things that you know you always take for granted. But you cannto complain about anything it will not get any better. She is her own person and makes her own choices. Whether or not she considers other people is another thing but she makes her own choices.
She is really a great person just trying to find herself in her life and the big world we live in.
I was in her shoes. Sort of, I mean I thought things came easy and that there are easy jobs out there to make money. But there is not. The jobs that pay good have restrictions on them. You give up something for something..
She mentioned that she is so desperate that she is going to go and strip or seel stuff for money. Ok got ya. One if you become a strippe it would be so hard to go to class unless your freaking strung out from staying up all night.. because yeah there is a lunch shift at CERTAIN strip clubs but none around here.. 2 if your going to sell something and get caught you would NEVER be able to get help from the government in funding your education. But heck what does my opinion matter to you? I had to yell at you sometimes to get you to believe in yourself and take the steps you needed to get to your dream. I had to push you and kick you in the ass..
I am just no body..
Forget that I came into your life.. Ruined your friendships, moved you to a place where you had no friends.. Kicked you out of the place you where living..
I just wish you could love me like I love you I guess.. But heck that is to much to ask.. I just wish that you are happy in your life..
I know I repeat myself over and over in here..
But I do it because it is what is inside my head.. The ideas floating around not going anywhere..
One day you will find someone that you will realize you will not be able to live without.. When that day comes I will be happy for you.. Because you and I both deserve that feeling.. You and I both want that.. just at different times in our lives. Which is fine..
One day I hope you look back like you do with all your other relationships and friends and realize that you where really happy.. Someday we will sit down and talk to each other and things will be really good..
But unitl then who knows..
I guess I better get back to work.
I just wnated to get those things out of my head..